She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
When you consider the sheer number of events that had to occur in order to prevent me from fucking her, there must be a god
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
Randomize