Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
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