i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
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