I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
Randomize
