Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
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