Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
Randomize
