see... this is why i put birth control in all my friends drinks
wait.... you do what?
the cashier wished me a happy fathers day while i bought condoms
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
Randomize