He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
Randomize