Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
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