The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
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