ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
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