I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
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