The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
Randomize
