I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
the cop asked for your social security number and you gave her your high school locker combo
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize