Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
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