So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
Randomize
