I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
you texted me last night and told me you couldn't find the toilet.
That explains the puddle of pee in my closet.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
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