I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
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