see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
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