So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
I'm not even planning on drinking that much tonight.. but I'm writing "emergency contact number" and your number on my hand just in case
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
