Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize
