He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
Randomize
