is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
Church boner. Awkwardddd
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
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