Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
Randomize