The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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