obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize
