Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
Randomize
