I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
every Thursday i draw one of my friends names out of a hat to choose who i will drunkenly text all weekend
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
Randomize
