Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
My landlord showed my apartment to a prospective tenant today and I had my vibrator and gun both chilling on my nightstand
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
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