The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
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