That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize
