i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
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