in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
Randomize
