it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
I am naked and annoyed.
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize