your thong is hanging out like whoa
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
Randomize
