Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
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