So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
this is a preemptive text before you call me freaking out: i have your keys and your car is parked safely a block down from your apartment.
you are a goddess
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
Randomize