Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
Randomize
