I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
I hate it when the guy who runs the chicken and waffles truck is convinced that I run a cult.
that is the opposite of a normal text message.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
Why are there condoms taped to the handle of Tito’s?
I get horny when I drink, pregnant when I fuck and I never lose the booze unlike my purse
Randomize
