I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
I dreamt Michael Jackson dropped his pants in front of me and I had to ignore it.
Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
