so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Randomize
