I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
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