Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
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