Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
You okay?
I walked into work with a banana and a loaf of bread
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
Randomize
