she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
COCAINE IS GR8
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
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