i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
Men are not even allowed to look at you without a condom on.
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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