So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
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