Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize
