one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
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