So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
Randomize
